Author: Carol Williams

Categories
Positive Thinking Time strategies vacation

How to get the most out of the holiday season, guilt free.

Truth time:  As we approach the holiday season, are you enthused and eagerly anticipating the gift shopping, the preparation and the family time, or is there an element of stress and, dare I say, guilt nestling in there, too?

If so, you’re not alone.  According to research, “Festive Stress” is real, with 31% of Americans describing the holidays season as “frantic”.

The problem is, we’ve all been conditioned over the years to expect that the holidays will be “magical” and “wonderful” – but the truth is that many of us feel drained by the hustle and bustle and we really just work too hard in a bid to have the “perfect” holiday experience. In addition, there is the stress of enforced down-time from work, while we chit chat with family over the turkey, or dive into another slice of pumpkin pie, all the while mentally checking our office to-do list.  It’s no wonder that, far from being the most wonderful time of the year, the holidays can feel like one big diversion of our attention from “the important stuff” – our work life- and guilt that we are “wasting” valuable time, all because for a couple of days, we step off “productivity path” and indulge ourselves with family-time.

But this guilt has a real knack for distracting us from what’s really important.  For most of us, work is a HUGE part of our lives, and a work-life balance is something we talk about, but never quite achieve. Before we know it, that romantic vision, that excited anticipation of time away has become a guilt-fest, leaving us more stressed than if we were actually at work.

The truth, however, is that the holidays give us a perfect reason to push that reset and recharge button.  Just because it’s time away from the office, doesn’t mean it can’t still be used productively.  Here are three tips to getting the most out of the holiday season.

1. Stop, just stop! We all know that one person who pulls off an amazing Thanksgiving dinner, while juggling the unexpected guests, the over-excited children …and the impossibly perfect home. We marvel at how they can do it all and still fit in baking cookies with the little ones and remaining civil with the Mother-in-Law. Yes, our lives are busy and there never seem to be any limits to the demands on our time, but no one person can and will be 100% productive all the time.

It’s an illusion, people!

What’s important is that you recognize the importance of time away and don’t fall into the trap of wrapping your self-worth up with how busy you are, like a present under the tree. Stop comparing yourself to others who appear to have it all down pat. It’s not some sort of competition to see who can rack up the most hours.  That’s just a one-way route to inadequacy highway. Think about it; the world can’t be filled with super-humans and you’ve been left out. Actively stop the comparison thing and shut off that inner (oh, so critical!) voice of comparison. Finally, concentrate on your inherent self-worth.  You work hard.  You are entitled to time away, free from guilt. Period.

2. Set an intention.  What do you want to achieve with your away-time? By identifying what you want from your break beforehand, you are far more likely to be able to meet those needs and in so doing, enjoy quality time. Maybe focus your away-time on all those “Important, but not urgent tasks” you have been meaning to do but…

Need some help with setting these intentions and boundaries? Check out our next blog on this important topic.

Categories
Decluttering Get Organized Productivity

Can’t keep up with your home or finances? The secret to peace is simpler than you think.

In our last blog we looked at the process of de-cluttering and ridding ourselves of all the paraphernalia of modern-life, whether that is in a physical, emotional, mental or spiritual sense.

Now, let’s extend that further into our home life.

Have you ever paused in your everyday life and wondered, “How did we even get here?” “Why does this have to be so complicated?”

Why do we make things so complicated?  We place so many “ifs” and “buts” around our lives that it becomes like an assault course of stumbling blocks, caveats and conditions and to top it all, there’s no prize for reaching the finish line!

So why continue living that life when all you crave is simplicity?  For three easy steps to untangling, de-cluttering and uncomplicating your home and finances, read on…(After all, life really is too short, isn’t it?)

  1. First off, take a good hard look at your life. Go on, really evaluate it.  What are you doing just because “That’s the way it’s always been done” or “Because it’s simpler that way” – is it, really? You know, times change and maybe a new system, a new way of doing something is just what you need.  Maybe that slight change in perspective could be a launching pad to a more streamlined you!
  2. We all know the saying, “Less is more”, right? But, how many of us practice it? Do you really need all those bank accounts?  Wouldn’t one or two be enough? Let’s face it, it’s just more work at the end of the month to reconcile them, more passwords to store, more paperwork to file…more work, more hassle.  What about the other household systems or chores?  What can you do to reduce, eliminate or delegate them?  Maybe household chores take up too much of your time or energy.  What about the ironing – a whole lot of work and as soon as it’s done, a new pile magically appears.  You know, by employing someone for a couple of hours a week, you could tick those chores straight off your list and focus on some good stuff instead.
  3. Of course, this new-found simplicity isn’t going to work unless you practice it! All. the. time. It might take a while to see the benefits but, by actually acknowledging the changes that you are bringing about, by noticing, for example, that delegating X has resulted in extra time, or how you are now able to compete tasks which previously would have required more time, more patience, more application and you still have energy at the end of it! What a change this could bring! One that impacts on so many areas of your life.

If you crave a simpler life, then go get it!  It’s within your power and your control.

Categories
Confidence Get Organized Goal Setting Positive Thinking Productivity

Do you know what you want to do but you can’t do it? Here’s the first step.

GREAT! You’ve recognized some changes you want to make in your life.  You’ve set your goals and have a clear idea of what you want to achieve, when and how. Congratulations … there’s just one small hitch.  One tiny problem. Something is stopping you from achieving those goals and putting a massive “Detour” sign bang in the middle of “Goal Highway”.

Often, we find that, although we can identify those steps we need to take to help us reach our goals, we are held back because we are locked into unconscious patterns, which anchor us to how we have always been; the long-held beliefs we have had that this is the way we’ve always done it, so why change? The fears of upsetting or impacting others if we make that change, the guilt because we are putting ourselves, our own needs first.  Sound familiar?

So, let’s look at 3 strategies to help us achieve our goals:

  1. Start by envisioning what you want to achieve. How will this make you feel? What effects (positive and negative) will this have on your life, on those around you? What will life look like on the “other side”?  Write this down if it helps (remember it’s for your eyes only, so no stressing if it looks anything other than perfect!)
  2. Clear out. Now, make a list of what’s in your way. What’s stopping you from achieving your goal Nirvana? – Be sure to consider all aspects of your life and wellbeing – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual and be honest, even though this might involve looking deep within yourself.  It will be worth it, promise!

So, now you have your list of “road blocks”, which can you remove? Set about removing, deleting and clearing all those that no longer serve you.  Doesn’t that feel better? Sort of like a “soul spa”, right?!  Remember, if it doesn’t support your better self – ditch it!

  1. It’s time to notice how you feel, unencumbered by what was holding you back. By performing this de-cluttering process, you give yourself more space to achieve your dreams and to explore new energy and new ideas.  You may have removed physical clutter – “stuff” in your home, your office (what about that email inbox? How many spammy emails does one person need?) Stuff on your desk, your shelves, stuff in your calendar, or it may be more about ridding yourself of emotional clutter – old ideas, bad habits, feelings of “not being good enough”, that ugly imposter syndrome that shadows your working life; whatever form your clutter takes, how do you now feel having acknowledged and addressed those feelings?

By removing these self-limiting beliefs and practices, you will free up “space” and give yourself the tools to get more done. As the Buddha said, “What you are is what you have been, what you will be is what you do now”. So, take your fresh, newly-decluttered, de-complicated self and move forwards with purpose!  Go do great things!

In our next blog, we will be looking at the next step of the process.  How to simplify your home and financial life.  Be sure to check it out!

Categories
Confidence Get Organized Growth More time in my day Positive Thinking prioritize Time strategies Wellness

3 Ways To Make Sure Your Energy Is Not Wasted

In the last blog, we looked at ways to control our energy levels and how to discover what in our life affects them on a day to day basis.

But, what about those times when our levels are at a high?  How can we keep from wasting those precious feelings?

3 ways to keep your energy at the max:

 

  1. Be selective. Good intentions are one thing, but if you spread that energy too thin, there will only be one loser.    We all know someone, who, when we come away from a conversation or encounter, makes us feel drained.  Who, when we ask a simple, “How are you?” will give us chapter and verse on every little thing going wrong in their lives.  You know, the “glass half-empty” kinda gal?

 

These people simply suck us dry of any good vibes and leave us not only carrying our own concerns, but theirs too.  Don’t let them!  Steer a wide berth from these “Emotional Vampires”, these people who are just going to bring you down and say, “Not today, thanks!”

 

  1. Look at your goals. Funnel your positive, light-shining energy in to what YOU want to achieve.  Your goals.  Not anyone else’s, – yours.  Create a list of what you want to achieve and think big here – don’t limit your dreams and then focus that energy into a plan of action.  Remember, little steps achieve big things and don’t let your energy be depleted by set backs along the way.  You’re in this for the long-haul, remember?

 

  1. Do what you love. Why are you spending time and emotional energy on those tasks that you HATE? That’s a sure-fire way of depleting your energy tanks.  Instead, identify and recognise those tasks you dislike, or that you spend too long on and either find someone else who loves that kind of thing (and make their day), or eliminate them in some other way.  Can they be broken down into smaller, less onerous tasks, for instance?

 

Lastly, remember, you’re in control.  These are your energy levels, your resources, the things that make you tick that we’re talking about.  You wouldn’t run a car without fuel, so why would you run your body without investing some care and long-term maintenance on it?

Pay yourself some attention and, I promise, you’ll be reaping the benefits forever after.

Categories
Growth Positive Thinking Wellness

Counterintuitive Thoughts That Will Change Your Energy Level

There’s no getting away from it, modern life is busy.  Fact.  We run around, barely registering the days of the week, the weeks of the month, endlessly trying to check off everything on our to-do list.

Our smartphone constantly reminds us of those dates we must keep; the kids’ end of term play, that medical appointment, updates from family and friends, and our inbox?  Chock-full of information, invitations, expectations…

Busy, busy, busy, right?

But, what happens to our energy levels?  How do we keep those at 100%, allowing us to be all things to all people, all the time?

The truth is, we don’t have to, and that’s okay, really.

Be true to yourself.  It’s okay to feel depleted occasionally.  It’s fine to admit that you’re firing on less than four cylinders.  Hey, we’re all human, so give yourself a break and don’t beat yourself up because you’re just not feeling it!

Be self-aware.  Notice how you’re feeling at varying times of the day, after various activities.  Make a journal, if that works for you.  Pretty soon, you’ll see patterns forming of energy highs and lows.

Which are the activities that are real energy-downers?  When do you feel energised with that, “Today, I’ll conquer the world” kind of vibe?

Capitalize on those highs, but don’t whatever you do, I repeat, DO NOT schedule meetings during these “high“times.  That’s a sure-fire way to zap those energy highs.  Instead, schedule activity that requires you to be present and “of the moment”.  Schedule in small tasks that you can tick off your list – you’ll feel on top of the world as your productivity goes sky-high!

What you put in, you get out. Once you’ve established the “when” of your energy peaks, it’s time to focus on the “why”.

Why are you feeling so great?  What’s causing this…and how can you get more of it?  Is it down to the food you’re eating?  We all know the link between a healthy, balanced diet and our inner zen.  Is it down to exercise?  Maybe it’s the opposite – maybe it’s giving yourself permission to do nothing for a while and giving those batteries a recharge.  Self-care should be a part of everyday for each and every one of us.

Perhaps you switched your cell phone off for an hour or revised your personal boundaries of when you’re “at work” or “at play”.  Have you caught up on that neglected social life?  Met up with friends or spent a little time doing something you enjoy?

Recognize what has resulted in your energy highs and, you know what?  Do more of it!  Factor in regular time doing whatever makes you happy, whatever gives you that “zing” and you’ll thank yourself for it.

As your energy levels soar, thanks to a little bit of “energy-awareness”, so you’ll find the strength to tackle those problematic meetings…

If you feel your energy is being sent in the wrong direction, or just being drained, you’ll want to check out my next blog to discover ways to ensure your precious energy is not wasted.

Categories
Uncategorized

This is the first thing to do when you feel invisible.

This is the first thing to do when you feel invisible.

In the last blog, we discussed 5 ways you may be self sabotaging yourself and how to “get out there” and what happens when you don’t. Maybe you are still feeling invisible, and not sure how to be noticed, and afraid of what might happen if you are noticed.

Go ahead. Be the person you are afraid to be. That’s the first thing to do.

Ready?

Becoming our true selves creates mutual respect, admiration and honesty within our lives. And this leads us to reach our goals. How?

 There is a certain amount of fear and hiding in us all. And, when we live life “full out” and stop hiding, we begin growing. And then we risk failing. And failing is essential to growth.

So how can you become the person you are afraid to be? Developing confidence and believing in yourself, your power and your ability to get achieve your ambitions. Your goals!

Remember, building confidence is not an easy and straightforward journey. But taking action is the first step to start building your confidence. You may fail at first, that’s ok. You are probably in very good company. Get on your feet and use what you have learnt to try again until you consistently get the results you would like to see.

Give yourself some love. Most of us are impatient by nature. We want changes to happen now. However, hardly anything in life happens out of the blue. Change takes time so start with small steps but keep a long-term perspective.

Learn to handle people undermining your confidence and don’t let them get through you. One of the best technique is co-opt their criticism. Somebody is trying to put you down? Try this: “You know what, you might be right. I have no idea if this is going to work. But I figure I have to give it a shot, right? If you were me, what would you do?”

Stretch yourself and branch out. Your opinion about yourself and what you can achieve has probably been moulded by your upbringing – your parents, your teachers, your friends. Start seeing things from a different perspective. Working towards greatness is a process and you need to learn how to live your life with intention. Rephrase “I wish, I hope, someday I will” with action statements: “Today, I am, my calendar includes, my deadline is”.

Lastly, put yourself in the right environment. Are the people around you pushing you forward or holding you back? Try to create your own growth environment.  Surround yourself with motivating,

Expect “setbacks.” Learn from your “mistakes” and keep trying. Find your focus. Be deliberate in making your daily decisions. And if you’re stuck, reposition yourself quickly. Sometimes teetering at the edge of a cliff is a good place to be. It means you’re growing and that puts you WAY ahead of the bulk of this population.

 

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