Let’s get back to Whelm!
It’s summer of 2023 and…we’re back! There’s essentially no (that I can see) leftover pandemic-shut-down things that affect us. Hooray! We have a lot of pent up desire to do a lot of things, and especially to have a lot of fun. I want that for you: to have a lot of fun! I want you to enjoy your summer, enjoy your life, and to do the things that really matter to you – and to be the person that you really want to be. However, sometimes because we want to do all these things, we can over commit and then we dance with overwhelm.I love dancing, and I don’t love dancing with overwhelm. How about yourself?
Today we are focusing on avoiding overcommitting and dancing with overwhelm in the context of creating a summer that you want.
Now that it’s July, here are some tips for a No Overcommit Summer.
- Remember that you get to decide to have the summer that you want. You are allowed to believe that you have all the time you need. My mantra: “What if I had all the time I need?” can be shared freely! From that mindset and from that perspective, I think automatically we’re more grounded. When we’re more grounded, we make far more rational decisions. We make decisions from our gut, from our heart and from our soul, and not from a place of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and feeling as though we have to commit to everything.
- Be grounded with lists. Making sure you’re grounded means different things to different people. It may mean creating a ‘not-to-do’ list. It may mean creating a ‘nice to-do’ list. The other day, I did that: I wrote down what I wanted to do for the week, and as I was doing this I realized I could pull out a “nice” (not necessary) list. So I made a line at the bottom of my to-do list and created the Nice To Do list. This was so empowering!
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- Be grounded with Sleep. When you look at your schedule, make sure the first thing you do is say, “okay, this is my sleep time”. That sleep time could be different in the summer, and you still need sleep, right?
- Be grounded with Focus time. Ask yourself “when am I best?” or “When am I at my best focus?” Make sure you’re clear about that.
- Be grounded with deciding: One overarching thing to remember about being grounded is being totally at peace with deciding. You may know about the five step UNSCATTER process starting with 1) Decide; 2) Discern; 3) Discover; 4)Practice; and 5)Celebrate. That first step, DECIDE, is in RED because it’s a really big deal! In my group programs, that ‘decide’ is in a big red ball. In fact, if you go to my website, I’ve got an entire 10 page guide to help you DECIDE (just enter your name and email). When we keep our options open because we’re “not sure” and there’s too many options and too many ideas, and we are thinking to ourselves “maybe I’ll make this plan, but maybe I’ll cancel, or maybe I’ll make these reservations and maybe I’ll cancel, or maybe I’ll buy something and then I have to return it” that is so much scatter and so much energy wasted. However, if you just take a moment, get grounded, and then make a decision from that grounded place, you can avoid all that back and forth and get a ton of time back. You get a lot closer to the truth: you have all the time you need (see tip number one!)
BONUS TIP: When you’re looking at your calendar and you schedule your vacations, you schedule your sleep, you schedule things that you’re already completely committed to, and one final thing. Go deep into your value system and say “what is my most outlandish desire?” Find a place in your schedule for THAT!
In fact, I did that yesterday. I had this outlandish desire that -in truth -I didn’t believe I could actually get. I would like a whole weekend completely and totally to myself, where I had no phone calls, no friends, no family members, no work, just absolutely, positively, for me and no else but me to do as much or as little as I want to. I have scheduled that, and it is the third weekend in September. I can’t even believe I’ve done it, but I have. So that is my most outlandish desire.
I wonder- what is yours? Let me know. What is your most outlandish desire that you’re almost afraid to say out loud? I’m going to have you say it and or type it below. And then- as a bonus – put it on your calendar. It took me 15 minutes to try to find this one weekend. It wasn’t easy. I’m a busy person, and I am so excited that I found this because the truth is that you have all the time that you need overcommitting, committing and dancing with overwhelm is a habit that you can break.
Have fun and stay in Whelm!
Warmly,
Carol
PS: I will see you again in two weeks. I’m on vacation starting Monday, July 3rd. My next blog/video will be sent out on Sunday July 16.